(Written 9/04)
We have fallen into a tradition these past few weeks where a bunch of us in the area meet at Rubble's Bar on Thursdays at six to celebrate the end of the week and catch up on each others lives. It has become a great thing to look forward to, and helps to make the week seem to go ridiculously fast. So last night we were out as usual, having our long leisurely dinner but as we finish it began to pour. Typically we hitch back as it is pretty easy at that time of night, but the rain rather put a damper on our plans. Seven of us decided to split a cab (they let you squish as many as you can) as we were all going the same way, so we called for the cab and we requested an SUV. Ten minutes later the taxi shows up and it is a beat up old 80's SUV but we figure that it will do the job. Jesse climbed into the front seat, four crammed into the back seat, and Cynthia and I popped a squat in the back. After a few moments we realized that we were wallowing in the quite pungent send of aged vomit, but due to our flexibility were alright with it. As we are pulling out the rain is moving from hard to the 'you-don't-get-rain-like-this-back-home' type of hard which made the streets like rivers and visibility near zero, especially when added to the extremely fogged up inside of the car from the eight of us inside. Despite the weather and tight quarters we were high spirited and on the way home.
Enter drama. As we are driving something happens – I'm not sure if he ran over a curb under a puddle or dropped the clutch or what – but there was a might jerk and huge bump and I hear Cynthia saying in a calm voice;
"Hatchback. Hatchback. Hatchback…"
As she is starting to say this I turn to look just in time to see the hatch pop open and Cynthia almost tumble to her doom on the busy road with cars right behind us. Luckily she somehow grabbed the seat and Tanne grabbed her under the arm and stopped her from tipping backwards out of the SUV. Of course now everyone is noticing what is going on and is yelling at the driver to stop and holding on to Cynthia and I as the back was full of stuff and we weren't really secure. Of course with our luck our driver is not only not a great English speaker but was most likely drunk, although I didn't realize that until later. For about three solid minutes we are trying to explain to the driver that the back is open and he needs to pull over, all the while Cynthia and I are holding on for our lives as the combination of fast driving, horrible AmSam potholes and an insane pouring rain are threatening to jettison us from the car. Eventually he stops and jumps out and closes the hatch.
We continue on our way and drop off Brigit and Jesse, and are heading up the mountain to drop of Cynthia. Now Cynthia and her husband John live a little ways up a mountain, as it is halfway between their schools. The topography here is pretty extreme with a few flat areas like Leone and Tafuna, areas right along the coast, and then villages up mountains. Anytime you go up into the mountains here it is an extreme change in elevation, so driving up the road we are continuously going up a very steep hill. Rubbing the condensation off the inside of the windows we could see literal rushing rivers of water on either side of the road. Finally, we make it to Cynthia's house and we ask the driver to stop – but again with the English issues – and he ends up stoping a good distance away from her house. But we weren't going to be too picky so now we are trying to open the back of the cab so that Cynthia can get out (still torrentially pouring) but it is stuck from the inside. Kelly bravely offers to get out of the car and try to open the back and she gets absolutely soaked and still couldn't open the hatch. At this point our driver seemed to realize that we were parked in the middle of the road and started the car and continued driving to pull off the road further up – leaving Kelly back in the road somewhere. Abandoning the back, Cynthia crawls over the seat and gets out of the car on the driver's side and we yell hurried goodbyes. Meanwhile Raj opens the other back door to let Kelly back in, and all we see is a knee high rushing river and Kelly pulling herself along the car to get into the door. Finally safely back in, Kelly is 100% saturated and looks just like she went swimming.
Back on the move, we have only two stops left and both in Leone. I stayed in the back of the SUV just cause of the rain and lack of understanding of the driver so I am becoming mildly car sick due to crazy driving and the omnipresent smell of puke. Finally on the way to Leone and feeling like we have made it through the drama for the night, I mistakenly let my guard down. After a few minutes of driving we are going through some huge puddles and our driver runs off the road or over a rock or something because there is a bump large enough to made us airborn inside the car, and I smash my head on the ceiling and land painfully on a tire iron. More excitingly the hatch had opened up again and I had lost my grip on the seat due to the gigantic bump so I found myself inches from tumbling into the road out of the moving car. Luckily I grabbed on to something or someone, and soon after Tanne insisted that I go to the front seat. Once in we find out that the engine is flooded and we are stalled… of course… After another five minutes of trying to start the car and some hilarious faces from TAnne we are back on the road and make it to Kelly and Raj's house.
So it's down to the driver and me. And now that I am studying him from the front seat I am pretty sure hhe has the eyesight of Mr. Magoo and I have a sneaking suspicion that he had had something to drink. REgarless, I am very close to home now so I just tell him how to get to my house.
"Sir, you need to turn on the road to the high school which is coming up on the left."
He misses the turn.
"Um sir, you missed the turn it was right back there."
"Oooo ok hold on I turn."
He proceeds to turn around and head back to make the turn, however he is driving so fast and is so dang blind and probably drunk that he drives into the side of a parking lot thinking it's the road full speed, and slams on the breaks six inches from a telephone pole.
"Hee, hee. This is not the road…"
Really? I had no clue…
Love it.
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